By popular request
- Thread starter dbk
- Start date
Triheart7
GT Owner
Thugboat
GT Owner
Kingman
GT Owner
Top 10 Tiger Woods jokes
One:
Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.
Two:
What's the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.
Three:
Tiger Woods wasn't seriously injured in the crash, but he's still below par..
Four:
What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went clubbing
Five:
Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron.
Six:
Perhaps Tiger should be using a driver?
Seven:
This is the first time Tiger’s ever failed to drive 300 yards
Eight:
Apparently, Tiger admitted this crash was the closest shave he’s ever had. So Gillette has dropped his contract.
Nine:
After a wayward drive, Tiger Woods found water before nestling behind a tree
Ten:
Apparently, the only person who can beat Tiger Woods with a golf club is his wife
One:
Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.
Two:
What's the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.
Three:
Tiger Woods wasn't seriously injured in the crash, but he's still below par..
Four:
What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went clubbing
Five:
Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron.
Six:
Perhaps Tiger should be using a driver?
Seven:
This is the first time Tiger’s ever failed to drive 300 yards
Eight:
Apparently, Tiger admitted this crash was the closest shave he’s ever had. So Gillette has dropped his contract.
Nine:
After a wayward drive, Tiger Woods found water before nestling behind a tree
Ten:
Apparently, the only person who can beat Tiger Woods with a golf club is his wife
Play like a Tiger!
Gentlemen,
After he was caught playing several holes at courses that he was not authorized to play, it appears that Tiger was given a few penalty strokes by his home course greenskeeper. That unauthorized play has resulted in a steep increase in his home course green fees, substantial damage to his favorite driver, and a marked reduction in his ability to use his putter for the foreseeable future. Just Do It.........and hope you don't get caught.
What a dimwit.
Chip
Gentlemen,
After he was caught playing several holes at courses that he was not authorized to play, it appears that Tiger was given a few penalty strokes by his home course greenskeeper. That unauthorized play has resulted in a steep increase in his home course green fees, substantial damage to his favorite driver, and a marked reduction in his ability to use his putter for the foreseeable future. Just Do It.........and hope you don't get caught.
What a dimwit.
Chip
fjpikul
GT Owner
texas mongrel
GT Owner
Although his injuries have meant that He has had to cancel all tournaments for the forseeable future, I think he'll be able to sneak in a few holes before Christmas.
ByeEnzo
GT
ByeEnzo
GT
centerpunch
ex-GT owner x2
Here's SNL's somewhat funny but predictable take:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/113210/saturday-night-live-tiger-woods-accident#s-p2-sr-i1
And here's a billboard I saw over the weekend when I was in North Carolina. (Unfortunately, it did not show what inspired him.)
.
http://www.hulu.com/watch/113210/saturday-night-live-tiger-woods-accident#s-p2-sr-i1
And here's a billboard I saw over the weekend when I was in North Carolina. (Unfortunately, it did not show what inspired him.)
.
Attachments
I see that car wash sign's been a little "battered", too. 'Appears everything in that shot is/was in need of a little 1st aid. :biggrin
Good, but my favorite will always be the Jane Curtin/Dan Aykroyd spoof of "60 Minutes" regarding the Lee Marvin/Michelle Triola breakup and legal fiasco:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/2306/saturday-night-live-point-counterpoint-lee-marvin-and-michelle-triola
centerpunch
ex-GT owner x2
Hey, thanks, I had totally forgotten about that! (I guess it WAS 30 years ago....)
Kingman
GT Owner
I am uncertain how this will transpire...I feel used...dirty...cheap...humiliated...but..ahem...
I HAD AN AFFAIR WITH TIGER WOODS...
I have engaged Gloria Allred to get me through the ......ahh.....through the ahh.....through the ahh....the pain.
Yeah, that's the ticket!
I HAD AN AFFAIR WITH TIGER WOODS...
I have engaged Gloria Allred to get me through the ......ahh.....through the ahh.....through the ahh....the pain.
Yeah, that's the ticket!
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S592R
GT Owner
- Dec 3, 2006
- 2,800
Buying his NIKE Golf clothes does not constitute an affair.... yes you got screwed. But not in quite the same way.
PL510*Jeff
Well-known member
Tiger Poll Results
A random national poll was conducted of 10,000 women as to whether they would ever have sex with Tiger. The results are as follows:
12% Yes
18% No
70% Not Again.
A random national poll was conducted of 10,000 women as to whether they would ever have sex with Tiger. The results are as follows:
12% Yes
18% No
70% Not Again.
Triheart7
GT Owner
BlackICE
GT Owner
The news had Tiger's girlfriend count up to 12 now and growing everyday! Gatorade was the 1st to drop him and I am sure not the last. So even though Tiger is a good prenup he is going to lose plenty! He may have been great on the golf course, but has shown very poor judgement on managing his future cash flow.
Now if only the news would spend this much attention on what really is important to our country we wouldn't be is such a big mess! :thumbsdow
Now if only the news would spend this much attention on what really is important to our country we wouldn't be is such a big mess! :thumbsdow
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