Headlines From The Year: 2029


B O N Y

MODERATOR & FGT OWNER
Mark IV Lifetime
Sep 5, 2005
12,110
Fresno, Ca.
HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR: 2029






Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate

heterosexual marriage.

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the AmericanTerritory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service

raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops

to 250 lbs

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.
 
'Probably all 100% TRUE.:frown

The good news is: most of us won't be here to put up with it.
 
hat's good stuff, Bony.:cheers
 
What about Billionare heiress Dannelynn Smith Stern Birkhead Marries CA Liquor King, Bony? :eek :cheers
 
Too funny !!!!
 
Paris Hilton

What about Billionare heiress Dannelynn Smith Stern Birkhead Marries CA Liquor King, Bony? :eek :cheers

I think our friend Bony has learned his lesson and is keeping a much lower profile after his ill-fated attempt to leverage the LA county sheriff's office in obtaining the premature release of another famous heiress... :lol
 
Unfortunately, some of it will be true I am sure. Bony is a Profit.:bow :bow
 
The last of Planet Earths surviving Peta members finally die of starvation after it is found vegetables have feelings too.
 
Heard Iraq wll soon be renamed New Texas!
 
Heard Iraq wll soon be renamed New Texas!

WILL NEVER HAPPEN !!

We already have WMD's down here and know how to use 'em.
 
Will those "forever stamps" still be good?:bs