Avaition humor.

[ChipBeck]

I know most of us have seen at least some of these before. But they still made me smile this morning.

Chip

WISDOM FROM FLIGHT TRAINING MANUALS

'If the enemy is in range, so are you.'
- Infantry Journal-

'It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.'
- US.Air Force Manual -

'Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword, obviously never encountered automatic weapons.'
- General MacArthur -

'Tracers work both ways.'
- Army Ordnance Manual-

'Five second fuses last about three seconds.'
- Infantry Journal -

'Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.'
- Naval Ops Manual -

'Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.'
- Unknown Infantry Recruit-

'If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up to him.'
- Infantry Journal-

'Yea, Though I Fly Through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 50,000 Feet and Climbing.'
- Sign over SR71 Wing Ops-

'You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.'
- Paul F. Crickmore (SR71 test pilot)-

'The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.'
-Unknown Author-

'If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage it has to be a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe.'
- Fixed Wing Pilot-

'When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.'
-Multi-Engine Training Manual-

'Without ammunition, the Air Force is just an expensive flying club.'
-Unknown Author-

'If you hear me yell; "bail out, bail out, bail out!", the last two will be echos.'
If you stop to ask "Why?", you'll be talking to yourself, because by then you'll be the pilot.'
-Chip Beck-

'What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots?
If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; but If ATC screws up, .... the pilot dies.'
-Sign over Control Tower Door-

'Never trade luck for skill.'
-Author Unknown-

The three most famous last words in military aviation are: 'Did you feel that?', 'What's that noise?', and 'Oh Sh**!'
-Authors Unknown-

'Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.'
-Basic Flight Training Manual-

'Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it..'
- Emergency Checklist-

'The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you.'
- Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot) -

'There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.'
-Sign over Squadron Ops Desk at Davis-Montham AFB , AZ-

'You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal.'
- Lead-in Fighter Training Manual -

As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives. The rescuer sees the bloodied pilot and asks,'What happened?' The pilot's reply: 'I don't know, I just got here myself!'

 

[Triheart7]

Funny and profound!

 

[STUNTS]

Love it Chip!!!
....and heres a question to you pilots that I need some splaining on:biggrin

The term"Blood boils" is due to what exactly?
The bends etc....

I'm more curious as to your blood boiling as in overheating or as to a gas entering the blood stream creating bubbles etc, as to boiling but with out the increase in temperature....?

I hope this question makes sense...

Thanks

 

[ChipBeck]

The bends.

Love it Chip!!!
....and here's a question to you pilots that I need some splaining on. :biggrin

The term "Blood boils" is due to what exactly?
The bends etc....

I'm more curious as to your blood boiling as in overheating or as to a gas entering the blood stream creating bubbles etc, as to boiling but with out the increase in temperature....?

I hope this question makes sense...

Tim,

The bends would be an accurate description of what you're asking about. The amount of gas a liquid can hold in suspension is directly proportional to the pressure that liquid is under. The atmospheric pressure at sea level is 14.7 pounds per square inch. In other words, a one square inch tube reaching all the way to space would contain a volume of air that weighed 14.7 pounds. That same tube filled with water to a depth of 33 feet would also weigh 14.7 pounds.

So if you put on a huge scuba tank and dive to a depth of 33 feet, your blood would be under twice the pressure (29.4 psi) and would start absorbing more oxygen and nitrogen until, after about an hour, it had absorbed twice as much of both of those substances as it did when you were on the surface. If you then immediately surfaced that gas would come out of suspension in your blood and form bubbles which clog blood flow in the narrowed passages near your joints (the bends). This is the phenomenon you witness when you pop the top off a bottle of Coca-Cola. The immediate release of pressure strips that liquid of its ability to hold its previous level of carbon dioxide which immediately begins to fizz into a spasm of bubbles.

The pilot of an SR-71 Blackbird flies at extremely high altitudes in air densities of less than 0.7 pounds per square inch. At such low air pressure the masks that conventional fighter pilots wear would be ineffective. Even breathing 100% oxygen through a pressurized mask, an SR-71 pilot could not absorb enough oxygen to remain conscious. The solution is to pressurize the pilots entire body using a spacesuit. If that pilots suit was to develop a leak allowing the pressure to escape, his blood would immediately lose its ability to hold the oxygen that it easily held at 14 pounds per square inch as the pressure around the pilot dropped to less than 1 pound per square inch. His blood would fizz like that Coca-Cola with the cap popped off.

This is boiling only in the sense that bubbles are created. One does not think of a soda boiling when the cap is popped off, so blood boiling isn't an accurate term either.

Other than that extreme example using an SR-71, it would be very difficult to develop the bends in any type of aviation endeavor as it is not possible to generate a big enough pressure differential in most types of general aviation aircraft. It is possible however, to lose consciousness in a minute or so if a jet loses pressurization above 35,000 feet. Donning an oxygen mask and diving to a lower altitude quickly will normally solve that problem and I am not aware of a situation where a pilot has developed the bends after performing such a maneuver.
Going all the way to space from sea level only changes pressure by 1 atmosphere. Scuba diving, on the other hand, changes pressure by 1 atmosphere every 33 feet. Diving to a depth of 132 seat is not uncommon and this changes pressure by a total of 4 atmospheres. For this reason, scuba divers must be far more concerned with the phenomenon of bubbles forming in the bloodstream than pilots need be.

Chip

 

[Apollo]

Funny and informative!
Let's see, how :driving:much faster will Ray need to go before he requires a spacesuit...

 

[fjpikul]

Stunts, blood boils in a vacuum, but then you also explode.

 

[STUNTS]

Chip,
Thanks for the most informative answer, greatly appreciate it. So we don't burn up in the "Blood Boiling" incident. Had an argument with a friends husband about 12 years ago on this one. :rofl Yes, it has stayed with me this long.... sorry..

Dr. Frank,
I don't want to explode my friend but thanks for the info...
:thumbsup

 

[steved57]

Thanks Chip, those are some really good ones and true

 

[Fast Freddy]

Chip - that is just awesome :thumbsup

this one struck me as the most unique - 'Without ammunition, the Air Force is just an expensive flying club.'
-Unknown Author-

Chip - i have gotten to the point that the only car forum that i really post on anymore is this one. i don't even post on gun forums or motorcycle forums anymore. with that said i spend alot of time at my other two new found sites which are Gold, precious metals investments and mining forums. i am known as the "Desert Diamond" on these sites.

anyway, my sig on those sites is "Faith without works is Dead" - James 2:17

and one members sig on one of these sites says the following > as you ramble through life you will meet lots of funny men. some will rob you with a six gun and some will rob you with a fountain pen......

 

[Fast Freddy]

Funny and informative!
Let's see, how :driving:much faster will Ray need to go before he requires a spacesuit...

:lol

 

[RALPHIE]

As I recall, the Texas World Speedway (where we ran at Rally IV) at College Station is no longer used by Indy Cars and NASCAR because the G-Forces generated by the very high banking (which we did not do at speed) were causing some of the drivers to get light-headed. The organizations were worried that someone might black out, and they don't want to have drivers wearing G-suits.

(That's G-suits, not G-strings)

 

[FlorIdaho Chris]

Ralphie-

TWS banking is only 22 degrees. Daytona and Talladega banking are at 31 and 33 degrees respectively.

The TWS paving in the banking is really terrible and bumpy particularly when run at speed. I would wager that disrepair is the main reason "The Show" does not run at TWS anymore.